6.24.2009

What's in a Name?

First off thank you to everyone for your advice on the joint account issue. K is currently in Cali for a business trip but we're going to figure out our financial arrangement when he returns!

Since I'm on the topic of combining our lives I will admit that I'm having a hard time giving up my last name. Now I have always planned on taking my husband's name for the sake of our children I wouldn't want us to have different names or give them an long hyphen (not judging if you do, just not my cup of tea).

So here is my thing. I currently use my middle initial with everything. All my credit cards, bank account, electric bill etc, I am Natalie K. D.... I have been going back and forth about keeping my last name and making it my middle name or just keeping my middle name and taking K's last name. My last name is very common so it's not like it's a special family name or anything but I'm not sure I want to give it up!! My Mom just took my Dad's name and didn't keep her maiden name and really wishes she had. I have also considered the 4 name option and just give our kid's K's last.

So ladies any advice on this topic would be EXCELLENT? Did you keep your maiden name as your middle name? Did you just take your husband's last name? Did you do the 4 name option?

Thanks in advance :)

18 comments :

  1. Even though I am the end of the line when it comes to my last name (as in, wont be any others after me), I am taking Dave's last name. I'm traditional that way, and I don't want to hyphenate or combine or anything.

    Also - I gave you an award! :) http://perksofbeingajap.blogspot.com/2009/06/honesty-is-best-policy.html

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  2. I'm traditional, I took hubby's name :)

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  3. I am called by my middle name, so I dropped my first name and kept my maiden name. I think you should keep your maiden name:)

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  4. This was easy for me because I have our family records dating back to the Revolutionary War (DAR paperwork). Every woman in this line moved her maiden name to middle and took her husband's last name. Before the onslaught of technology this made it way easier to track family lines. So now I am Margaret (Maggie) Taylor M... and I love it. However if I am "in trouble" or the hubs is being funny he will still call me by my original "full name" and say Margaret Ann! It's your name and the most important that YOU feel good about your choice.

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  5. I plan to take fiance's last name and drop my maiden name. Reason being...I have two brothers to carry on my last name, I'm not that close to my dad or his family anyway, I share my middle name with my grandmother so it has more meaning to me.

    I guess I would suggest just keeping the name that is more meaningful to you.

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  6. I took the hubs last name. I considered hyphenating, but I was warned by other women who had that people tend to just pick your husband's name anyways because they don't want to do both. I have brothers, too, and male cousins, who I knew would carry on the family name. However, my husband is the only one who can carry on his family name, and I want to have the same name as my kids, so I just went ahead and took it. (The bonus? I got rid of a last name that was incredibly difficult to spell and switched to a nice, simple one.)

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  7. I dropped my middle name. Didn't really like it that much anyway. My maiden name became my middle name. I got your package in the mail yesterday. THANKS A BUNCH! I am starting the Shred today!

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  8. I have heard from a few of my friends, that it's really emotional to give up the last name that they were born with and take their husband's name.

    Something that a couple of my family members have done is the husband and wife both change their names to (wife's-husband's last name) and their kids have the same hyphenated last name. For instance, if your last maiden name is Jones and you are marrying a Frank, you would both be Jones-Frank.

    Personally, I have such a common last name that I can not wait to change it (hopefully to something better :)

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  9. I took my husband's last name. I think he would have been hurt if I hadn't. And as much as I adored my maiden name and still get a secret twinge of glee when someone accidentally uses it, I am glad I changed my name. I usually sign my middle initial too so I wanted that to stay the same.

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  10. My parents cursed me with 2 middle names which means I have to decide if I'm going to keep mine as well. I mean really 5 names is toooo much. If your last name is really common and you don't have that much attachment to it, you could always move it to your middle name slot.

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  11. I dropped my middle name - but noelle is in my email address - so everyone is always reminded of it!

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  12. I didn't keep my maiden name b/c it didn't sound right...so I kept my middle name as it was...

    I think it is up to the individual person

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  13. I just took my husband's last name and kept my middle name as is.

    To be honest, it never even crossed my mind to do otherwise. It shocks people every now and then that my middle name isn't my maiden name. I guess that just wasn't the "norm" where I grew up, so I never thought to do it.

    That being said - I'm glad I didn't make my maiden name my middle name....just because I think it would have sounded funny (for me). :)

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  14. I kept ALL my names! And I have a lot. I formerly had two last names and only used one (long and complicated story originating with my dad).

    AND, to complicate things further, I'm not really an Abby - I'm an Abigail and it's my middle name.


    Thus, I'm Whitney Abigail S____ K_____ M_____.

    INSANE!!! I know!!!

    Do what works best for you - swapping the middle for your maiden sounds good. An option that I didn't have since I go by mine!

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  15. I just kept my name exactly as it was when I was growing up. For me, it's the name I was born with and I didn't see why I needed to have the same name as my husband. We're married and if other people don't know that just because we have different last names doesn't really matter to me. I have taken some slack for not changing my name from people who are not relatives but whatever, that's their problem. It's whatever works for you.

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  16. I love my middle name and have loved it my entire life. So when push came to shove and I went to the Social Security office to change my name, I changed my legal first name to a double name. So technically I have all four names but my original middle name is now part of my first name and my maiden name is my new middle name. This was a compromise because Hubby did not want me to drop my maiden name and I did not want to drop my middle name. That might be an option out there for you!

    You can have four initials too! (my great-uncle has four also!)

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  17. I took my husband's last name and I must say that it was difficult for me because I was very attached to my maiden name and it was nice and easy. My new last name is very italian and not at all like my maiden name!

    I like the idea of using your maiden name as your new middle name!

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  18. I made my maiden name my new middle name when we got married. I didn't want to lose my last name, and since I'm an only child I felt I owed it to my parents.

    Also- your last name (like mine) would be a perfect middle name for a son!

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